The Proud Franchise

Greg Oden Cannot Be Cock Blocked

 

Could this be the lady friend Greg Oden is sending lewd pictures to?

Earlier this week, there was an outrage over pictures of Oden's member posted on the internet--which has caused Enzyte stock to skyrocket.

I Dream of Rubio

The Don is at it again.

There are reports from a certain New York publication that Donnie Walsh still has his eyes on a certain 19 year old from Spain. No, the pedophilia laws in Spain are not more lenient for older, upper class Caucasian males. Walsh is still looking for ways to acquire Ricky Rubio, the Spanish prodigy originally drafted by the Minnesota Timberwolves.  

Knicks 78, Dallas 1,284,657

At least, that's what the score may as well have read. I'm not even going to lie to you. I don't know what the end of this game looks like aside from the NBA.com recap.

Today marked the first time I'd turned off a New York Knicks basketball game in disgust during Mike D'Antoni's coaching tenure. While a loss is a loss whether by 1 or 100, The Pro--... ummm... Shamed Franchise truly made me embarrassed to be a Knicker Lover for the first time in forever this afternoon.

Halfway through the third quarter I said to myself, "Fuck this ho-ass shit," and turned to the Jets game. They lost too. Awesome New York sports day, right?

Duh-wight Howard's Barkley Impersonation

Heyyyyyyy, worrrrrrrrrrld!

Looks like we've got ourselves some competition with the Charles Barkley impersonations. Dwight Howard takes a stab at it.

Dwight Howard does his best Charles Barkley impression for EJ, Kenny, CWebb and Charles 1.21.10 from Turner Sports on Vimeo.

2010 NBA All-Star Starters Cause Uproar

 

TNT unveiled the 2010 NBA All-Star starting rotation this past Thursday. You can see the 10 finalists above.

Many are clamoring over Allen Iverson making the All-Star game as a starter and how he doesn't deserve to make it. We at The Proud Franchise are not upset over AI's inclusion in the mid-season classic. Iverson helped usher Hip Hop sensibilities into the NBA landscape. In terms of press, he has become one of the league's more under-appreciated players because of it. Also, let's be real. Only good things can come of AI in an exhibition game. No, we are not mad at that.

Stephon Marbury: China's Finest

Stephon Marbury's retirement from basketball has come to an end, Proud Ones. Huzzah!

The former NBA All-Star has signed with the Shanxi Zhongyu Brave Dragons of the Chinese Basketball Association. According to Yahoo! Sports, Marbury will earn a reported monthly salary of $25,000--a stark contrast from the $21 million he earned last season in the NBA.

Marbury's sacrifice in salary may not be just another weed-induced lapse in judgment. He expects to market his Starbury line of shoes and apparel to China's... umm... ginormous population.

Revenge of Eddy Curry

Doesn't this picture encapsulate how every Knicks fan feels after hearing about the latest Eddy Curry injury?

Knicks 99, Detroit 91

...and Brother Martin smiles on The Proud Ones yet again.

The New York Knicks stop the bleeding for now, taking advantage of a Richard Hamilton/Ben Gordon/Tayshaun Prince-less Detroit Pistons 99-91 to split the Dr. Martin Luther King, jr. Day weekend home-and-home.

Knicks Consider Jumping the Gun?

According to Chris Sheridan from ESPN's True Hoop Blog network, Donnie Walsh did not dismiss the possibility of the New York Knicks trading for Gilbert Arenas.  

Now I have to ask two questions:

Knicks 104, Raptors 112 + Knicks 90, Pistons 94

Can you tell the difference between the two nightmarish New York Knicks losses this weekend?

There's "respectable final score" L number one...

...and, there's number two. Hark! 'Twas a shitty weekend, indeed.

I love Eli Zaret's suit. He looks like he'd just come in from a long day at the track. Also, the Detroit Pistons haven't changed their graphics since Rodney Stuckey was Joe Dumars.

[Blogger's Note: Blasphemy, I know.]

Birdman[, Red Monkey!] - Mattress King Commercial

I don't know why, but I've never been more convinced that Chris Andersen is done with the junk.

He got crossed up pretty good by that goofy kid, though.

Props to Mike Crown for putting us onto the video and title.

This weekend's game recaps are on deck. Worry not.

Oklahoma City Local News [Rightfully] Clowns Knicks

The New York Knicks really played themselves with that ghost excuse shit. Now we have to deal with that biting Oklahoma City satire.

Like I mentioned in our initial coverage, it had to be Eddy Curry--as if he was in any danger of seeing game action. Of course, Oklahoma City media and locals can't clown the Knicks without clowning themselves.

Magic Johnson Denied Knicks Tickets

Just getting caught up on the week's stories. So, simma yuh bloodclaaat poom poom.

Yahoo! went full-World Star on that one.

Meanwhile, it's RealGM's coverage of the Magic Johnson ticket debacle that takes the condom--I mean, cake. I love how Johnson tries to play the whole shit off to save face. You just know the nigga called Madison Square Garden like:

"Hey. Yeah, umm. It's Magic. Listen... Don't worry about them tickets I was axing for. Me and Candi--I mean, Cookie... We gonna go see Alva Tar at the 'Me' theater in Harlem."

Knicks 93, Philadelphia 92

The New York Knicks edged the Philadelphia 76ers 93-92 last night in a battle of heavy-hearted frontcourt anchors.

While David Lee and Samuel Dalembert both had much cause to hit the sauce, it's the NBA.com recap guy who sounds drunk.

Knicks Blame Haunted House for Ghastly OKC Loss

The house isn't haunted. You motherfuckers just hear the boos in your subconscious. It's gotten that bad for some of these guys.

The New York Daily News reports that several members of the New York Knicks were terrified by their temporary living quarters prior to a 106-88 loss to the Oklahoma City Thunder. Jared Jeffries and Eddy Curry even go as far as to say the team hotel was "haunted."

Wilson Chandler: Film Critic

I don't know why, but this is about the funniest shit I've ever seen.

I mean, fuck the article. It doesn't capture the essence of Wilson Chandler without that latch-key child stammer anyway. I'd much rather hear him talk about how much Mike Myers terrified him growing up.

Knicks 88, Oklahoma City 106

--And it really wasn't even that close.

What the geeky highlight reel monitor fails to mention in his Knick-friendly recap is that The Proud Ones were devoid of energy and played absolutely zero defense. While he wasn't the only culprit tonight, I call it [David] Lee-fense.

Happy New Year, Knicker Lovers!

I was going to make a long-winded apology and explanation for our hiatus, but none of that shit is really relevant. What does matter is that, 2010 finds our proud warriors at a crossroads. Gregg Popabitch and I have returned to help see you through what's sure to be a highly entertaining season. Granted, it won't be Isiah-era entertaining, but what could be more fascinating than watching Mr. Thompson work?

Oh, right. There's always Danilo Gallinari singing Beyonce's "Halo."

Sing that shit, cockface!